I know there's a lot of people who don't like me and wish I would go away. I think we got off on the wrong foot. Most of you know me as the awful gimmick commenter who ruined the comments section for "For a Few Paintballs More". But if you let me explain, you'll see that it wasn't my intention to destroy that board. Back then, 5000 comments on a review was seen as a lofty goal, and the people posting there tried, successfully, to achieve that before the third season premiere. But they didn't do it by making substantive contributions to the comments; probably the last 500 or so comments before the premiere were just random non-sequiturs or variations on "POP POP". So, when I started posting "POP POP"s in that board, it was meant only as an absurdist commentary on the means by which the goal of 5000 comments was achieved. I didn't reply with a "POP POP" to any comment that was furthering the discussion of "For A Few Paintballs More", only to those that were padding the comment count. But then, something strange started happening. A lot of my replies to comments weren't showing up. Figuring that this was yet another quirk of Disqus, I went back and reposted the missing "POP POP"s. And then, again, for all the ones that were still missing. What can I say, being unemployed, proactive, and committed to a certain kind of absurdity are a heady mix. I was as shocked as anyone when, maybe a week or so later, every single one of the "POP POP"s I'd posted but that hadn't appeared, were suddenly there on the board. So, despite my intention to only reply to each instance of comment-count padding with a single "POP POP", suddenly there were far more than I'd ever meant there to be. If you compare my comment count on my profile page, which is less than 2000, to the total comment count on "For a Few Paintballs More", which is currently 9133, or more than 4000 more than the count when I started posting my "POP POP"s, you'll see that it was, in fact, a Disqus malfunction that caused that to happen, and for that I'm sorry. But if everyone could find a place in their hearts for the little gimmick commenter that nobody wanted, I know we can make them laugh and cry until we grow old together.
I have to go now. My planet needs me.
Note: Evil Magnitude died on the way back to his home planet.